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About Digital Art / Hobbyist Official Beta Tester Tara34/Female/United Kingdom Groups :iconall-anthro-lovers: ALL-ANTHRO-LOVERS
furry for life
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Deviant for 5 Years
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Full body single character pinup commissions, Cell shaded quick colours,  Fanart or OCs welcome, as tame or mature artwork. 

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Pinup full body full colours
Full body single character pinup commissions, full colour detailed painting Fanart or OCs welcome as tame or mature artwork. 

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The last few days of an email exchange between me and my ex.. I got sucked in.. not to romance or anything but you know those lovely verbal exchanges, so wanted to share my last few days with you of our convos. Its a mental lulz read. My emails are in italics and his bold so enjoy, this is copy pasted with no edits.

You too Big guy.  Hope you get well and up on your feet again.  Honestly it was that you kicked me out on the road which changed everything.. but thats why I could never look to you even as a friend or a fling just too much painful baggage after you were my soulmate for sometime.  I just have to look after myself and you understand why a full severance is the only way for my peace of mind and future.
I love you dearly and wish you the best in your life.
I will look after myself and look to making my life better so you dont need to worry about me as Im a tough kitty.
Move on with your life and forget me, and please dont contact me again

I now remember what happend. youto pick  packed all your stuff stopped with me for 2 days days with your things packed ready to leave I besod it i just csnt gged you to stay I told you  i would unpack your stuff, You said no. We slept in srperate beds. I begged t told u again, for some reason you went  off and was going to smash the TV up I told you to get your stuff and fuck off I was going    at s after the 2 usual days & ask you to come home. I though sod it let her sweat a bit after all the v violent  acts &smasing but i hqve to usp stuff i though let her sweat. I  kept looking for you using any excuse bringing toys down your mother told me once let me in & we chatted a bit i was distraught I asked if i could go up & speak with you She said exact words she wasnt prepeaerd to be a match maker I continued to look for you for days that when I saw you at the top of Tule Lane I was going to ask you to go for a coffee & with the intention you i insulted the way i look and shot off Tuel Lane. By then i had enough I thougnt sod it i need a beak I was going to give you a few weeks  I enjoyd being free. All I ever wanted to do is get you to get the mental health care you need all i ever got back was you know whgood intenntions do .  I took beating after beating as well as mental torture. Where anyone else would have walked long before i did. You even mentioned how bad yoy treated me and said sorry, I told you not to worry thinking thins would chane thats how fucking much i love you & dedicated to you i was. Then i saw you in Halifax you looked a right state even with a broken back I tried youur a veyr beatiful girl & intelgent i still love you all i want was to be with you the good times were amasing You should realise some people actualy love you and care  fo youu outide your family.
I got told today im going to be fine sand walk again but i need to put in a lot off effort. Now I dont  have time to do any more if you get
the help you need ill guide and protct yo & love you all the way. You will have a partner who adores & will love you for ever. Now the choice is yours. All you get to do is say yes its not begging you need it your on your way down hill rapidly. I dont want you dead. If you want me to fuck off & not contact you I will. For good. I do love you dearly I wish you would realise thet.

Hah you dont even remember what happened that time.  We lived together fine no items were packed and I had laundry out that day.  You came to mums house after your course.. after arguing with your mother on the bus and having no money you stormed of back to the house in a foul mood (as I told you id argued with mum and couldn't get the cider money),  then stayed at your dads the next day with your phone turned of so I could not contact you.  So I stayed alone at that house that night alone with your message to get my shit out of there, so I packed up my stuff and posted the key in the letterbox not seeing you.
And well you never contacted me even if you dropped of my stuff in all that time, By that meeting point on tuel lane we was both already in other relationships so it didn't matter we had been apart over a month and moved on towards new lives.  Yoy stayed away to sever things fully so you cant blame it for being successful as its what you chose.

That was the time before lass you can't remember. Another go at mental torture. You was trying to even goad me yesterday min you hate me next you dont. Make your mind up. I could not help you with your bags becauof my back. Look we was both fucked up on booze and drugs it could be either but Im 99% what your on about was ages before. Half the time. I kept soberishr than drink so  i could look after you. You even t wishing youd die in your sleephanked me on a couple of occations. Stop being stubborn think back how much you battered me I still stood by you. I can't be botthered arguing anymore. Do you feel I love & care for you I'm not against you in any way. I don't have time for this. Ive a lot to do. If you really want to be loved you got it all you have to do is say. Thats my last chance. I'v put up up more than any man would.bout it.  Think a but it before blowing your mouth off. I'll leave my email address on until December in case you change your mind. From then on I'm moving on for good. You mentioned aout you wanted to be crazy & not give a fuck like me as some sort of roleagainst you or takls about  model are you stupid I do all this so you dont end up  like that. Do you really want to wear a mask were you feel pain all the time. And thats all it is feeling shit & you was dead. Because thats all it brings. Can you admaait how you treated me as well. Any way i'moff to bed your beggining to piss down my back and tell me it's raining. Think about it. Please Im offering you a way out. More than I would anyone else. I'm off for the night it chill out time for me. Good night little one & think with positive view  All the world isnt against you. This is the last time I offer this.
If you cant even remember reality  what your on about happened months before that.  Check your old Facebook messages they have the message and time from you when we parted.  You just got the phone connected that day at your house,  hence I tried to ring your mobile while it was of and you stayed home.  Id show a print screen but cleared my messages yesterday but you should be able to locate it if you have it.. though it might still be on my phone I will check.  It adds insult to injury you claim not to even remember why you kicked me out...
I'll check it tomorrow if I did then I am internally sorry. We can put this behind us if your wrong or right. You never answered the question about your violence. Anyway like I said i dont care either  way what you beside. I just don't want you to end up an empty looser shell like me. It's hard to be normal again. We both need to calm down & listen to what each other has to say. You also never answered my question do you feel loved by me.  Or carred for I have changed but I can be colder than I ever was. I choose not to be. I was rolling roud the ward today sining limp bizkits Keep on rolling the disgust I got fpmsl
Why really contact me after all this time as it seems like your banged up in hospital with nothing better to do so you hit up the standby.  Give me an honest answer and spare me the declarations of love, why want me back after so long whats changed apart from you cant go out and have fun?  I feel sick of you using me,  if you cant deal with me at my worst you dont deserve my best.  I mean lets get honest with each other now the rose tinted glasses are of and its back to out usual sick little exchanges.  You are quite addictive you and your games.
Because I see a goodness in you i never had but i also see a stupid unhappy side 3
like i had. and don't want you to end up like i was. youve been through to much in life I,ve added to it. For what i did i deserve to die. I owe you a lot lass. I shou ld of   been therefor you. But I wasnt its my way of redemption  even if its to protect you from yourself. what aout my 2 questions
Now i would take take you at your worst.
Right im off to bed night

Your not wrong in what you see, but you ended stuff moved on and forced me too. You kicked me out onto the road after mum had booted me out and that really cut so deeply it made me want to kill every bit of feelings I had for you.  I tried to with flings and fucked up stuff but I never forgot you enough. I could forgive you for that about as much as you forgive your ex.  It hurts and is sad to talk to you thats why i want to be left alone with my own life separate.
Im so glad you said that.My folks  lee & come to see me today Oh & Harls have after t off the blue
i told her gbout you shr asked was I insane & she missed & me that i canmove in with hher as she has a ground floor flat and she still loved me with all her heart. she made me feel so warm & special & all i did was run away from the love i feel for her. All that would happen i you is you would kill me or drive me in to a deep suicidle depression like you did before thats why i kicked  you out. you destroyed evey thing i had i had no optioin
but to get rid of you. move on you say i all ready have. no more conctact you say you got that too. I cant even hate you thats how much i care for you.

good by good luck

Tee hee you take care then.  Honestly its been a blast and dont take anything I said too seriously I was just fucking with you these last days.. you cant say you didn't deserve it.  You can still get under my skin a lot for sure but the fucking lulz we type is fucking hilarious.  Well I hope things work out for you.. this has been worth its price in gold to re read.
I konw were were pissing ourselfs especially when we saw you in `hx that was so funny you just walked past us with your usual  drnnege. harls bless her said she is very troubled whatsup with her. i said a lot we were howling laugh. she then said is she a smck head i said she needs to be fpmsl i then told her about whe you get angry about your romanian orphan she was crying every time after that when we saw a mental we would do your impressioYou certanly passed the bordom away t week fpmsl i better sop im ready to cry laughing and wakw everty one up.Ypu are a good sport.
Anu way by by & rememberr dont  shake the bed on your bed apart fpnsl . Take care ill leave you alone now unless you to carry the joke on fpmsl.

oh yea last question when did you see us i n \HX and scowel at you. I cant remember plusinever scowl, You got to admit she is gorgrous not bad for an old man eh. You no  i dont take anything seriuos so no hard feelins :))))))))))))

I hate it when theey turn the lights off so earleyit ruins my fun time

by by sport

Shake the beds says the person that has eppy fits.. the irony is not lost on me there.
And well you can think what you like, but today I got back to 500 pushups and squats and im going to push for 1000 of each before the nights up.. so whatever you think or laugh up if I look tired or run down I dont care.. nothing feels as good as the adrenaline from pushing your body,  making your muscles ache forcing yourself stronger.  I feel proud so nothing you can say can dampen my pride but its nice of you to try.

*****Attached was a creen cap of Kathy Bate sin the movie Misery holding a knife. *****
to yhe
Good for you lass. an y way got some good news for you as you hate me so much & feel no pity.
You broke my back on the L1. Remember if you can time when mental then smasted me in the face with the pizza dish then threw it across the room then got that heavy meatal oven dish then smashed me in the lower back I collapsed then you kept punching lin the back of head & realised i was seriously hurt so you stopped & i could'nt walk for about 2 week Yea lap it up. I remember hearing my back pop. Then after that I got the back problems ists because you. Well done you must be proud. I nearly died from it after i broke the other 2 when I was with Harl it pushed the one you did causing a bleed that's why I had a full blood transfusion. couldnt bottred for me even if im wheel chair bound
i have access to a gym 7 days a week I've lost that much weight & now i'm starting to get ripped for Harls the  thing I could be bothered for you. Well will laugh all we want.
I'm glad I i kicked yuo out I've never been so happy after yesterday.with my hot babe saying that  to me even if im wheel chair bound. Thts true love something you  will never get or feel yourself.
Anyway I'm off for good. I cant be bother with you

Funny Misery photo,  you thinking of nurse KittyKathy looking after you while your all banged up with a booboo.  I guess in this state there would be no need to hobble you like the movie,  though I prefer the books more brutal axe amputation over the hammer smashing.

I just love to read your tolkienesq re imaginings of reality.
How this evil horrible scum of the earth was brutalizing this big strong 6 foot 4 guy and he never did anything except try to give me his love and devotion.  And still the white knight for ever he came back to save her soul from the evil inside her,  but alas it was too much she was too poisonous and he was saved after being wounded in battle by a bedside angle that promised her love and still he cant help typing to his wicked monster ex even to say how happy he is and how she is condemned to a life of being a forever alone cat person.
Cool story bro.  I dont hate you,  If id really have felt like that I would not have answered your email.  But you wanting pity is something I dont feel for you as you got yourself into this situation you have to get out of it and not expect me to be your emotional tampon.

Hey grumpy pants cant you take a joke.I thought you wanted a slagging of competition. you dum bint why so series arhahahaa.

I looked it up we were both right. I wanted to be happy sick all the shit between is. I tried and tried but you  would not see sence you was always right . A push became a shove I was really depressed & began to hate you so i got rid and moved on and am really happy. I dont hate you now i just cant stand you after way I tret me. BYW i was always eyeing birds up. fpmsl. I couldnt' cope with your jeleousness like when you thretend Jo in boots & wanted to smash the place up. So it was buy buy psyco. I wouldnt want you back in a billion years. fpmsl arhahahahahh why have sour stake when you can have cobi stake

I know Im know Im so evil and shitty and just the dregs of society lol.
You contacted me out of the blue not the other way around with all your declarations of regret and love.  So clearly you have the problem that you cant seem to keep away from the monster that I am.
Well enjoy your kobi,  me I prefer me some bacon anyhow, cheap and tasty and addictive.

So thats the story so far lols..


Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
United Kingdom
Kindness 30%, Chaos 30%, Indecision 30%, Evil 10%

Bi Polar Chaotic Kitty.... I feel like a grumpy old man most the time... just I happen to be a 32 year old female lol

Loves drawing pinups, big boobs or small but you would think I prefer very busty by my gallery.

I love many cartoon styles and love to combine this with curves.

My dream is to keep training my skills to become as good as professional standard^^

Blondes... who to draw up for the next poll painting 

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Tiquitoc Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2016  Professional General Artist
Hello Tara, I'm glad for all the :+fav:es, :thanks:...
CH1996ART Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave
mhedgehog21 Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2016
Thank you for the faves. :meow:
ThomasProofreader Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2016
Do you know your picture of Brandy Harrington wearing a derby/fedora, bow tie, tuxedo jacket, red sequined swimsuit, and black high heels from The Magic Hour? When does she appear in that episode from Brandy and Mr. Whiskers?
GeekThom Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2016  Professional General Artist
you may not be super successful being an artist, but nobody should quit their passion though. since high school, i've wanted to make it as one, because the left brain world sucks...but i hang in there, im in my mid 30's, but i have to stick to it because it's what i of luck of whatever decision you make
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